Jess-- If you read this do not cry and do not worry. Nothing is changing my mind. I have lied to you and I am sorry. It will all be explained here and the letter my mother will find on September 20, 2005.

My life has been shit. Pure and simple shit. I've cut, I've cried, I've screamed until I did not have a voice anymore.

My mother told me to my face that I was a mistake, that I was never wanted. That I ruined everything for her, for everyone. That I could kill myself, and she'd never care. That I must do it outside, not to get blood on her floor to clean.

This time, it will be on her ugly brown carpet. My blood, my body, my letter. And no one will change my mind.

I've made up my mind-- September 20, 2005 at 5:20PM (The time and date I offically turn fifteen) I am going to commit suicide. I cannot take it anymore.

----- Here are my lies: Kev, my now ex (I'm guessing)-Boyfriend who is 21 and lives in Nebraska is mad at me for not fooling around with him on the phone. Oh well... fuck him.

I am not a virgin anymore. Jason and I had sex.

I have been fucked over one too many times-- and this is my FUCK YOU to the world.

Jessica-- You are by far my best of friends, you are my only friend within the same state. I love you dearly for being my friend. I am sorry to do this to you- But no one is changing my mind. No one is going to stop me.

<3 Good-bye All.-- Amanda "Mandie","Manda" Jane Potter.